Decline should not be seen as a sign of failure

Clinical social worker Felicity Chapman is concerned that the current mantra of 'ageing well' might be doing harm as well as good. While we should give older people every support they need to remain active and independent, we should also accept that, at some point, everyone who lives long enough will become frail and dependent on others for their basic needs. If we place too high expectations on ourselves, we may feel shame or anger at our frailty, instead of acceptance. This is only likely to worsen our mental health.

Truly valuing older people means valuing them as people even when they are not strong, when they do need substantial amounts of care. We should strive to live the type of life we want into old age, but we should be kind to ourselves when that is no longer possible.